![]() ![]() Funny Poems That Will Perk Up Your Day . We followed the little white dots into the gardenwhere we found them resting by the squash and leaning on the broccoliand belly- up under the turnips with remnants of our Picasso's on their tiny backsand scared to death they'd peed on us and grandma would seeand know somehow we were murderers, Jeannie and me. ![]() By Gwendolyn Poliszczuk. Check out the other winners of the 2. Reader's Digest Poetry Contestrez- art/i. Stock. A fruit is fated to be sliced. It sings before the blade,In joyful hope that now at last. It's future has been made. The slice is swift. The foodie's fast! The rind is cut and saved. The pulp is squooshed and. Squished and smashed! They never live to tell. Impatiens die before their time. ![]() I guess it's just as well. So never leave your plants with me - this message I implore - -Or else your healthy Wandering Jew won't wander any more. By Lois Corcoran. Content continues below ad. Right of Waypowerofforever/i. Stock. The lobster and the crab one day. Proposed a friendly race. Agreed upon the time were they,Agreed upon the place. ![]() ![]() In honor of #NationalPoetryMonth, some of our favorite submissions from the 2015 Reader's Digest Poetry Contest touch on the many wonders of the natural world. Funny New Year resolutions - Diet Diary. The following is a diary extract from a friend of ours who gained weight during December s festivities and now needs to work. After so many years of writing poetry there are plenty to enjoy on Fizzy Funny Fuzzy. Check out the full list below. Seeking Short Funny Rhyming Poems? We have lots of free funny, sexy, rude poems, quotes, limericks. In honor of #NationalPoetryMonth, we present these top funny poems from the 2015 Reader's Digest Poetry Contest, all guaranteed to crack a smile. Dinosaur Poems poems about dinosaurs. The Dinosaur at Old Faithful, by Albert Whipple Hadley; The Dinosaur Bones, by Carl Sandburg. 12 Humorous and Funny Christmas Poems to Chuckle, Chortle and Cackle by. These funny Christmas poems range from slightly serious to hilariously humorous to sincerely. Rain by Shel Silverstein - I opened my eyes And looked up at the rain, And it dripped in my head And flowed into my brain, And all that I hear. ![]() The start and finish lines were where. The two thought they should be. The crayfish with a clock was there. To act as referee. And though the rule- book then was read,Not all was clarified; For as the lobster forward sped. The crab crab went to the side. By Jeffrey Krise. Eskimo Wisdom. Loredo/i. Stock. A Yupik Elder asked me once of an illness he had found. Affecting all the Gussuck folk that he had been around.? What is this strange disease? Whatever are they striving for? What does it take to please?'I answered that I did not know the causes nor the cure. But Affluenza is the name and its an ill for sure. He looked at me with wisdom's eye and shared his culture's lore. I sit like someone at a job interview. We discuss arms, legs, torso, headand arrive somewhere between sitting and reclining. He takes a brush, dabs at a palette, regards my body as though it's an equation to be solved. His gaze is neutral, uncritical. I might be a vase of flowers, a bowl of fruit, a just- killed rabbit. Easier to bare your body than your soul or your heart. Thinking of sunflowers and apples, I relax into my pose. By Sarah Barnett. Content continues below ad. Class Reunion - A Humorous and Funny Poem. I read an ad in the paper one day. In the Dallas Morning News. All about my class reunion in. A town near Santa Cruz. I tried to decide if I should. To meet my friends and peers. And see how classmates from the past. Had aged in all these years. I finally resolved that I should go. And see. what I could see. And meet my friends from the senior class. Of nineteen fifty- three. I rented a tux and a black toupee. Then brushed my shoes and. I trimmed my mustache and my beard. And changed my under wear. I emptied the bottle of after shave. And rented a limousine. I brushed my teeth. Ultra- Bright. Then gargled some listerine. I soon arrived in splendid form. With a flower on my chest. Sporting a rented diamond ring. And smelling. my very best. Now I was dressed in the finest garb. Like a monarch at a feast. When I discovered that no one there. Seemed familiar in the least. Well not a soul remembered me. And my heart dropped to the floor. When I remembered that I was in. The class of fifty- four.
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